This year, as I organized the themes for my planner, I determined that January would be the ideal time to start working on a couple of habits I found I was woefully lacking in: self love and self care. In case you are wondering how I differentiate between the two, I define self love as internal and self care as external. Although each overlaps and feeds the other, this seemed a clean way to help me focus.
This was not the only discovery I made about myself, though.
I also realized that while I am pretty darn good at achieving goals, I often neglect any sort of reward. In the past, I have almost always felt that the accomplishment itself was the reward. Recently, when talking to one of my accountabilibuddies, we were discussing the importance of taking adequate time to acknowledge the accomplishment, particularly when it is a big or challenging one. And sometimes the best way to do that is by rewarding ourselves. We decided that generally our big weekly goal would be an ideal one to reward. As I considered how I might want to applaud myself, I wanted to make sure they tended to coincide with my goals of self love and self care. I wanted to make sure that only one would be food related, only one could be monetarily related, and the remaining rewards would need to be no budget.
My first week's major goal was just sticking doggedly with my habits and smaller goals, including self care and self love. It wasn't long before I decided the ultimate reward would be an at-home spa day. This would be the perfect combination of sticking with my goals, while also incorporating some sorely-needed self care and self love. It was such an amazing treat to myself, I wanted to share how I created it so you can treat yourself too!
Think of spas, and your mind automatically conjures certain images of restrained luxury and abundance. There is a calmness and softness. This guided me in preparing for my day. And let me assure you, a little preparation in advance makes the day of feel far more pampering. When I thought about my ideal day, I knew I needed to:
- tell Mr. Distractions that I was planning this. Do not skip this step. You want your significant other/family/roommates to know that you will be taking time for yourself. You don't want to be interrupted and you don't want to feel guilty about the time you're taking. Maybe whomever you share the space with may even be able to just go out for a while.
- pick the room I would be relaxing in. The obvious choice for me was the bedroom/bathroom. Since I knew what room, I wanted to make sure everything else I needed would be collected there.
- hunt down my candles and lighters or matches. If you don't have or don't want to use candles, nightlights or lamps also help alter the ambiance. You just want access to low level lighting.
- collect the various lotions, hair products, bath scrubbers, manicure equipment, etc. that I would be applying throughout the course of this day. It was time to use all those fancy things I save for "someday". The day has come. Now I know that sounds like a long, diverse list. Don't get overwhelmed. You'll know what you need after you think about what kind of day you want. If you have socks or cotton gloves that you don't mind getting a bit messy, those are great too!
- access to the final touches: music, water, my bathrobe, books and magazines or YouTube videos, any massagers or soakers, and a stress ball.
If some of this doesn't make sense to you, you'll see how I used it over the course of my day. If you don't have access to all of this, that's ok too! You'll know what matters to you soon enough!
Once I rounded up these items over the course of a couple of days, I was ready for the big day of relaxing. I did have the luxury of being able to sleep in that day, so I did. The rest of my morning routine didn't actually vary too far from the norm. But then at some point, I excused myself and settled into the bedroom.
First, I made sure the lights were dimmed, any candles I used were accessible (although not lit at that moment since I would have to leave them unattended while I was in the shower), and some of my favorite music was playing. While I would have preferred soaking in a bath, I don't have a tub, so a relaxing shower, including a scalp massage was the next best thing. Take your time and take care of yourself.
Once I was dry, I finally took care of my often neglected skin with a lot of body lotion. I tend to be rough and tumble with myself, so this was a chance to offset a little bit of that. Then I popped on my bathrobe and pulled out a foot soak I'd received as a present many years ago. This one does offer a massaging function, but any sort of deeper basin will work. While my feet soaked, I was able to wear a neck massager and relaxed my hand muscles with a stress ball. To carry the good work of the foot soak a bit further, I put lotion on my dry feet and slipped them into some cotton socks.
After that, I applied a face mask and read some of my current book while I let it work its magic. You could set a timer and doze, flip through a magazine, watch some YouTube videos: whatever it takes to relax while the mask sets. When I rinsed it off, I followed it up with a face lotion and an undereye cream.
Finally it was time to give myself a manicure. There are a ton of instructions on the internet for ways to give yourself your own manicure and I'm sure any of them are clearer than the instructions I would give. It was a wonderful way to finish the day and see a visual reminder for the next week of the time I took to care for myself.
Remember, you can scale this day however you need and want. But take advantage of those items you've been gifted or the free samples that have made their way into your cabinet. give yourself the gift of some "me time". And let me know what your spa day would have!