New year, new resolutions, amiright? This is the year I:
- eat healthier (right after I get all the bad food out of my house. All the tasty, tasty bad food. What does "bad" even mean though? And don't I deserve a treat sometimes? And how do calories even work? Aren't calories energy? That means I'll have more energy if I eat ice cream than if I eat celery!)
- exercise more (except this week because I'm working nights and I need my days to sleep and get tasks done. And except next week, because I'm working days and I get home late and I still need to cook dinner and I want to relax some and I want to see my family that I'm working these long hours for. And except the week after because....)
- lose weight (although really, if I think about it, I'm safer in a kidnapping incident because I have more force behind my tackles. And anyway, if I'm not just accepting my body for what it is, I'm damaging feminists everywhere. Can't do that!)
- read more books (you know, when I'm not cooking and exercising and trying to get more sleep....)
- see my friends more (except when I'm cooking healthy because I can't balance that and everyone's dietary needs. And not when I'm exercising because I'm not sharing my sweaty, B.O. glory with them. And who can really talk when they're winded anyway? And not when I'm reading because that's just weird.)
- and 87 other resolutions that are all fantastical in their own ways
And this is why resolutions alone don't work. They are all worthwhile and admirable, but to really make them stick you can't just list them. You have to break them down into smaller and more definable goals. And then you have to start implementing them (but not too slowly or you'll get bored and not too quickly or you'll get overwhelmed). And then you have to think about what happens if you miss a day or have a backslide, things that all too easily happen. After a while, it starts to feel way easier to just stay as you are. "People love me just as I am! Why would I change anything about this magnificence? I am the embodiment of all this world should be!"
But what if you just can't shake the feeling that, as awesome as you so clearly are, you could be EVEN MORE amazing? Where's the life hack for that?
Two years ago, I gave in and tried the "Word of the Year" concept. In case you haven't heard of it, this is where you choose one word that will inform your actions for the whole year. I was dubious. It seemed like so much to put on one verbal talisman: keep my life in check and on track for a year, through every time I'm flagging, every time I'm stressed, every time I'm lost. Is there one word that would do all that for me?
Shockingly, yes! Of course! Would I waste your time telling you about it if it failed miserably?
That year, my word was "diligence". Every time I'd felt lost and stressed, I hadn't been diligent in an area of my life. And I knew, going forward, that to keep up with everything I wanted to do over the course of the year and my life, I would need to be earnest in my efforts. (Hey, I admit I'm busy and easily distracted. It's right there in the title of this blog.) And those efforts would have to go beyond making lists and trying to check everything off of them. It had to involve internalizing the changes I'm trying to make while I keep all the other facets of my life still going strong. And what would it take to make all that happen? A whole heap of diligence.
What was my payoff for embracing this word?
- Becoming WAY more comfortable in the languages I'm working on.
- Saving a significant amount of money for my Emergency Fund.
- Completing the first phase of an intensive training for my professional life.
- Becoming president of the state chapter of the professional organization I belong to and, through diligence, did not completely drop the ball and ruin everything.
- Designing, drawing, and sending out Christmas cards (a much larger accomplishment than it seems).
- Moving into a house that better suits my needs and wants.
- Completing a 365 photo challenge.
- Strengthening skills in several arenas that I'm personally passionate about (such as Photoshop and drawing).
- All while keeping day-to-day life as reasonably intact as one can hope for!
But I noticed a trend toward the end of the year: I was doing a good job at being diligent and staying on top of things, but I wasn't doing a good job of using my resulting free time. Yeah, sure: sometimes I was using that time to handle other projects, work on a language skill, or read a book I'd been wanting to get to. But, just as often, I would "come to" realizing I'd just frittered away an hour playing a game or going down the rabbit holes of the internet. Not that there is anything wrong with this. But there is something wrong with coming back to your senses realizing that you don't remember how you've ended up in this proverbial gutter, eyes dry, drool in the corner of your mouth, cookie crumbs on your shirt, and nothing more to show for it than a dead phone battery and an infinitesimal level-up announcement, an hour (or more) faded from your existence. And that's when I realized my word of the year should be:
"Intentional" is a great partner word for "diligence" (something that could still use refining). But my favorite fact about this word is that it doesn't start giving my actions a negative connotation. As I said, there is nothing wrong with playing video games, getting lost down rabbit holes, binge-watching my new favorite show. The problem is not remembering how I got there in the first place. And I realized it didn't end at my thumbs. I could crave ice cream all day then get home and eat it without even paying any attention to the flavor I'd been desiring. I could lace up my shoes to go walking for exercise only to realize upon returning that I barely got my heart rate up. But if I make it a point to be aware and to do these things with intention, then I'm not merely existing, I'm experiencing. I'm planning for these things to happen. I know how I ended up there and why. I might be crushing candies for an hour, but I have chosen to, not merely arrived by happenstance.
Now about that free gift: I find the easiest way to internalize my word, why I chose it, and the goals that go with it is to see it all the time. I printed out a sign, made it the wallpaper on my personal computer, and even had it as the lock screen on my phone! This was so helpful to me I intend to do it again. I would like to offer the same thing to you! Just sign up for my email newsletter! It only comes out once a week and includes an overview of my new posts, as well as some things you can't find on the blog. As for the Word of the Year sign, you can expect to receive that within a week of signing up! Just click here to get started!
This all sounds pretty magical, right? No longer are you writing out resolution after resolution, trying to keep track, breaking them down until you feel broken down. You are ready for your word! But wait: how do you pick just one? The dictionary is huge and there are so many variations! Need a little help? I'm here for you! For just a $1 donation, I will send you my Word of the Year worksheet. As a freebie, I will personally work with you via email to help you choose! Your donation will help offset the expenses of running this site and I get the thrill of helping you live your best life ever! Win win! Ready for a little one-on-one help? Donate here!
Cheers to the New Year!